April 11, 2017
There is a combination of factors in the MSDF environment that make me feel like self-harming myself or doing something worse. I honestly do not feel I am safe in this place (MSDF). What I mean by not feeling safe is what I am capable of doing to myself.
I know I’m going to eventually end up in the same category as those inmates that couldn’t take or bear this environment’s high stress level and ended self-harmed or trying to commit suicide. This place takes away my will to want to live. At times I feel like I’m on some foreign land cause my cell window takes away reality. The tints in the windows stop any inmate from being able to see the outside world. That is a good example of why I feel what I feel. The way the windows are designed make me feel the building (MSDF) is submerged under water.
I am being deprived of outside recreation while other DOC institutions/facilities provide outdoor recreation. The lack of outdoor recreation I believe is not healthy for me. I am not allowed to go outside for creation because MSDF doesn’t have any accommodation for such activity. I have been attending recreation inside the building the last seven months. I am not provided fresh air, natural sunlight or adequate recreational activities.
It will be assumed by me having mental health needs staff will accommodate me and not be punishing me by depriving me of outdoor recreation that every other DOC facility provides inmates.